We will soon know (I hope) who America has elected as the next president.
When the election results are clear, a large portion of Americans will be disappointed, perhaps even angry. Another large group of Americans will feel elated, victorious.
If Vice President Kamala Harris wins, Democrats will no doubt wonder if Donald Trump will cede defeat. If the former president wins reelection, Republicans will thump their chests in self-righteousness.
I’m a conservative, but I can see both of these viewpoints. It’s understandable to be anxious or upset when your “side” or your candidate loses. It also makes sense to feel happy or even smug when your candidate wins.
Either way, this election has been a hard-fought battle. But it does not need to continue to divide our nation or damage relationships among families, friends and neighbors as we move past Election Day.
This election year seems messier than other election cycles in recent history.
President Joe Biden’s cognitive health appeared to decline rapidly and Americans realized smack in the middle of his reelection campaign that he was no longer fit for the job.
Enter Harris as his replacement. She was fresh and full of joy but lacking in substance and authenticity.
Opinion: Harris woos women but has lost men. It may cost her the election.
In recent weeks, Trump and Harris have gotten nasty: Racial slurs and name-calling have been rampant. It’s like the schoolyard bullies are now running for the Oval Office.
This election came at the end of four difficult years. After a contentious election in 2020, Trump refused to acknowledge that he lost, resulting in the now-infamous riot at the Capitol on Jan. 6, 2021. COVID-19 gripped the world, and we grappled with the consequences of a pandemic, including government-mandated lockdowns.
Thanks to economic stimulus packages that Trump originated and Biden continued, inflation spiked to a 40-year high and Americans are still struggling with sharp increases in the cost of food, rent and other necessities. War has raged between Ukraine and Russia, and Israel is fighting for its existence against Hamas, Hezbollah and Iran.
It seems like Americans are more divided than ever. But a study on polarization ‒ by the Democracy, Conflict, and Governance Program at the Carnegie Endowment for International Peace ‒ found that things are not always as they appear.
“American voters are less ideologically polarized than they think they are, and that misperception is greatest for the most politically engaged people,” the study reported.
I hope that is true − for our country’s sake.
The study also revealed two other pertinent findings: It’s actually American politicians who are highly ideologically polarized, and, although Americans may not be as polarized as they think, they are “emotionally polarized.” Or put simply, “they do not like members of the other party.”
I’ve seen this firsthand. I’m an outspoken conservative, and after USA TODAY published my column explaining why I − and millions of other Americans − will vote for Trump, I received a wave of vitriolic backlash. Every job has its downsides, and angry and personal feedback is certainly part of this one.
Opinion: I don’t like Trump, but I’m voting for him. Here’s why many Americans will, too.
I’m not complaining; I’m extraordinarily blessed to do this job for a living. My point is that we live in a political environment where a reader scans an article, then messages me to disparage my character, to berate me as a woman and mother and even to target my children with insults. My colleagues, on the left and the right, report that similar responses to their work are routine.
An environment where Americans decide to immediately dislike their fellow citizens because of their political views isn’t healthy.
So Trump and Harris call each other awful names, and their supporters feel like they’re in a battle with their neighbors based on who has a Trump sign in their yard and who has a “Hope is making a comeback” sign.
I often put myself through what I call the barbecue litmus test (I live in Texas, y’all). You might find it useful as well.
The questions I ask myself: Would I have my neighbor over for ribs if he voted for Harris and I for Trump?
What about if I favor tax cuts, and he feels it’s patriotic to pay a significant amount of taxes?
Would I share a beer with my neighbor if he favored abortion restrictions? What if he was even − gasp! − pro-life?
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On what issue or candidate do I draw the line and say: No, I can’t have my neighbor over for a barbecue because of political views?
I’d like to believe that most people in America can hold dichotomous thoughts in their mind: Republicans are not garbage because they are pro-life and support the only candidate who is pro-life. Democrats are not garbage because they are against Trump and support the only viable candidate who opposed him.
It’s true that election anxiety is real. A new poll from The Associated Press-NORC Center for Public Affairs Research found that 7 in 10 Americans feel anxious or frustrated about the presidential campaign.
Americans are invested in who wins. They’re hopeful that the next president will fix their problems. According to Gallup, the economy, democracy, national security and the next Supreme Court justice are top concerns for voters. When times are hard, the consequences of inflation still inflict pain and people feel stressed, it makes sense to look to our political system − our elected lawmakers − to fix things.
But none of that justifies hating fellow citizens who disagree on how to find solutions or about which politician has the best policies.
Whoever wins or loses, we shouldn’t hate each other over it. If anything, we should hate a system that’s become warped and favors ideological polarization. We should loathe a system that rewards elected leaders with the means to somehow acquire significant wealth while spending years, even decades, in office.
We should be intolerant of politicians who get elected based on certain promises, then do whatever suits their ambitions once they’re in office. We should demand better of our elected officials, and when they don’t serve us, we should not elect them again.
If we feel angry on Election Day, we should fight the system, not each other.
Nicole Russell is an opinion columnist with USA TODAY. She lives in Texas with her four kids. Sign up for her newsletter, The Right Track, and get it delivered to your inbox.
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This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Opinion: Will Trump or Harris win? I have an even better question
